Victoria 'don't tell nobody'

This Christmas is like a spinning treadmill of wedding after wedding after wedding! We ended up at Victoria's Secret instead of Red Rose which was initially supposed to be our table at the dinner held after the wedding...yes too many guests without invites were doing the very Ghanaian thing of insisting they must also be seated despite not having invitations. By the way no disrespect to my fellow GH people, but lets be honest it happens many many times. Any way, by the end of the night me and my good friend 'Gail' - no that's not her real name but that's what Oprah calls her close friend so I suppose why not my close friend too huh?- realised that Victoria held no secrets at all what-so-ever!

We were in the charming company of three buxom middle aged Ga women who made us gape and laugh at their ludacris antics from the time they harassed -yes i literally mean harassed- our waiter to bring them drinks -seven beers between the three of them - till the time they started talking drunkenly loud, spilling their beers- twice in a row - and telling us personal stories about them and asking me and my good friend 'Gail' if we also lived abroad like they did (big laugh there for us you know, because it's become too ironic every time people ask us if we live in Ghana, especailly during the christmas season when all the london and American boggas -fake ones inclusive- are in town staying away from the freezing cold on the pretense that  they are visiting their families).
I turned and said to my friend 'Gail' ''How come we always ended up in the middle of some kind of crazy drama?'' and she just shrugged her head in bewilderment and we both laughed in silent agreement.

So we partied hard at that table till almost 11pm with these young old ladies and the bridal party; drinking more wine and beer and soda's whilst the waiters packed up the furniture,tables, decorations and lights  around us in an obvious indication that the party was officially over and we should gather our persons and 'skidadle'. In the end they had to turn off the lights in the hall, twice before our rowdy party got the message and finally left and went our individual ways after saying the sweetest thank you's and good byes to one another.

'Victoria's Secrets' was a good laugh and a cry and by far the star of the show she stole from the bride and groom. However it felt  really good to get home, take that cold bath, remove my cloudy contact lenses, crawl into bed in my gigantic knickers and tank top and to curl onto that side of my bed that i always do, close my eyes and slip off into that deep sleep my body badly needed.

make-up superstitions

Okay so correct me if I'm wrong but whats all the fuss about that make-up superstition? My whole weekend was taken up by a beautiful and quaint wedding of a friend from school and her long time boyfriend -yes lucky bastards they got lucky and found each other ages ago!

I love weddings, they give me the chance to check out the occasional good looking man, eat food i don't have to pay for and most importantly check out the hot clothes i can sew in the near future and the shoes i have to look out for in my local shoe stores the next time i go out hunting for heels.

Anyway, so at the wedding i notice that a couple of girlfriends who are also getting married in a couple of weeks look rather plain, it strikes me that one of them is barely wearing make -up and the other is not wearing any at all which to me is a total NO-NO!  Turns out that there is a small superstitious belief floating around for women insinuating that they have to look ugly, or wretched or untidy before their wedding day or something. So I'm thinking 'Oh hell no, this charade needs to be stopped ASAP!' and that superstition burned to the ground like a witch burned at the stake in the the time of Joan of Arc!

I love my make up, its almost like a ritual act of love making for my face. I get a little thrill as i reach for my powders and brushes and slide on the special pink lip gloss which makes my lips pout in silent invitation. Plus i want to look cute with it especially if i know i'll be at a function which requires me to dress up and take pictures. I want to be the bride who looks at the pictures of herself and her friends after the wedding day and says 'oh my goodness these gorgeous perfectly made up women are my friends!'

So ladies, fiancees, soon to be brides... screw the make-up superstition that you have to look unkempt and hairy prior to you nuptials and say yes to foundation and powder and different shades of lip gloss and perfume. Its not carved in stone some where that u need to look any less beautiful than you do on a daily basis before your big day, whoever said that is definitely dead and turned to dust now. So slap it on, pose and smile for the camera!

The Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Needs To End

It was 6pm, and I was still mumbling rhetorically to myself 'I'm going to find you, you bastard!' It was a bad day, another bad day and i was still trying to find my ex's home address online in the UK so i could call up a few bulky male friends n send them over to his home to hustle him up. It was so hard getting over this asshole who had broken my heart three times in total in the space of 14 months- and yet i was still hooked up to him like a heroine addict. I wanted to hurt him badly but most importantly i wanted to know why he had chosen HER over me and why he had even bothered to start a relationship with me when he knew perfectly well he was secretly 'hiding' another woman. I needed CLOSURE.

I wonder if i'll ever get closure. Probably never, but i'll continue to obsess about it for awhile.

I wrote a novel almost a year ago. It's sitting in a brown paper envelope, almost 200 pages long, getting lost among the other brown envelopes containing bill receipts and other miscellaneous stuff. I pick it up once in awhile and think about publishers, but i'm afraid. Afraid that i've written the same sob-story that every young woman in her early twenties is writing about. Afraid i'll be boring and ordinary and not a sensation.